This week I took my new boyfriend home to meet my family. They all immediately fell in love with him. (Particularly my dad and my brothers… He’s a man’s man.) His German accent didn't seem to bother them. I know it's never bothered me. Anyway, my new boyfriend and I took my sister and my dad to get icecream at ‘The Cone Hut’.
I pulled into the parking lot and was trying to downshift instead of just braking. (I’ve only been driving a stick shift for two days. I’m still getting a feel for him… we still have our awkward moments.) Well, I stalled him out in front of four teenage boys. I restarted him and tried again, but I stalled again… and again. My dad and sister hopped out of my Audi and got in line for icecream, while I figured this out. Then I leaned out the window and laughed,
"Oops, I have it in third gear… no wonder I can’t get it to go!"
The boys on the bench outside ‘The Cone Hut’ all laughed mockingly at me. (Jerks!) But, I didn’t care. I have the bestest boyfriend a girl could ever ask for!
I slid him into first gear and parked him away from all the 'common' cars. My sister, my dad and I ate our icecream on the bench. It was a nice mild summer night back in my hometown. (What a great beginning to my vacation.)
By the time the sky started to get dark, I had completely forgotten about those obnoxious boys. The icecream tasted great and I never noticed when they got up to leave. Nor did I notice when they piled into their 2003 silver Grand Prix. I had completely forgotten, until…
They pulled along side our bench, stopped the car and the driver (the punk!) leaned out and said… "Oops, I guess I forgot it was in third gear!"
All the boys roared in laughter. (They thought they were so cool.) They peeled away and started to corner ‘The Cone Hut’ when the finger of fate dug around in his nostril, picked a huge booger and wiped it on those punks. (Oh sweet justice!)
At this juncture I would like to give my readers some background on the setting of my story. ‘The Cone Hut’ has a drive through lane around the back. To separate the drive through lane from the parking lot; there is a curb about 2 ½ feet wide. The curb extends around half of the building to guide traffic to the drive through window. Okay now back to the story…
The boys had no sooner peeled away when we heard a thud, we turned to see that their front driver’s side tire had driven up (just a little bit) onto the curb and then it fell back down onto the regular pavement. The boys thought they were in the clear, but didn’t realize that the angle at which they had driven up and down the curb, left the 2 ½ foot curb positioned between the front driver’s side tire and the rear driver’s side tire. They really thought they were good to go, so the punk that made the rude comment to me... well, he floored it!
The car bottomed out as the rear driver’s side tire slammed into the curb. (The scraping noise must have been heard for blocks.) The back of the car was instantaneously launched two feet into the air (I’ve never seen anything like it.) My sister screamed in delight and shouted "Morons!" I couldn’t stop laughing and my dad’s mouth hung open. We kept waiting for the car to pull around the other side of ‘The Cone Hut’ so we could point and laugh at them, but they didn’t come around. Five minutes later, after the foolish boys had gotten out of their car to inspect the damage (behind the building and our of our sight line), they meekly pulled around the other side of the ‘The Cone Hut’ and exited out onto the street… Their windows were rolled up and they were facing forward.
My dad walked over to the curb to inspect. There was a 3-inch long groove carved ¾ of an inch deep into the curb where the car was launched. He shook his head and said, "That had to have done some major damage."
I turned to my sister and said, "I think I looked a whole lot cooler in my stalled out Audi A4 than they looked in their bottomed out Grand Prix."
She nodded in agreement as she finished up her ‘cherry slurpie vanilla icecream float’, "Oh yeah Janie, way cooler!"
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